Bill Simmons thinks Bosh sucks--enough to be paid like a super-star

[This morning saw Geist, our ever lovable rapscallion, get into the lowest of low-grade Twitter scuffles with Grantland’s head NBA writer, Zach Lowe. To all his little Kafkas who have no idea who that is, it’s okay. Geist will be posting on “Love, Politics, and the Left” soon]

It began with a tweet.

Which was met with a reply:

And thus ensued the following conversation:

I have a great deal of respect for Lowe. His reporting and analysis are some of the best in the business and though a bit wonky, his podcast has quickly become one of my favorites. Truth be told, I’m not sure why I included Lowe’s twitter handle in the tweet. Probably because I wanted to get a reaction from someone whose opinion I value. And Lowe surely gets shit like this all the time, so it’s commendable that he even replied to me in the first place.

That Lowe proves himself to be a company man is neither particularly surprising nor is it something I’d hold against him. If I worked for a company like ESPN I’d give a diplomatic answer and a bit of snark at the end of my replies too. And it’s worth noting that my criticism does not extend to Lowe himself who’s largely defended Bosh during the Miami years.

And it’s not like Lowe is deaf to the shit that gets hurled at Bosh, much of it from ESPN. His Bosh commentary is oftentimes framed with “hey, this dude gets a bunch of undeserved shit slung at him.”

As for the merits of my critique, it could easily be settled by looking at the numbers, which I don’t have and frankly don’t have the time to compile. It could be done though. And it could be the case that among all writers, when aggregated, there’s not much substance to my criticism. That being said, there are a few ‘analysts’ out there who have a disproportionately large soap box and who fit the description.

For instance: Lowe’s boss, Bill Simmons.

Never mind all of the inane things Simmons has said about Bosh dating back to 2010 (like saying continuously on his podcasts first that the Heat were really just the “Big Two” and more recently that the Heat are just LeBron). Here’s what Simmons wrote about Bosh on June 18^th, 2014:

Q: Gut Feeling -- have we seen the best of Chris 

Bosh?

Almost definitely. For one thing, he suddenly has 11 years, 796 regular-season games, 89 playoff games and nearly 32,000 career minutes on his NBA odometer. But once the minutes, rebounds and free throw attempts start slipping, that’s the beginning of the end for elite big guys — Bosh dropped from 39.7 MPG, 8.5 RPG and 6.7 FTA in the 2011 playoffs to 34.3 MPG, 5.6 RPG and 2.4 FTA in 2014. At the same time, his 3-point attempts climbed from 0.2 (2011) to 3.7 (2014). Basically, Bosh quietly morphed into this generation’s Sam Perkins. And look, I loved me some Sam on those mid-’90s Sonics teams; Bosh could play for another 10 years doing a rich man’s Perkins impression. But not for $20 million a year.

If taken literally, Simmons is saying that Chris Bosh isn’t worth $200 million over the next decade. But seriously, who would argue that? Maybe LeBron would be worth $20 million a year at 40, but...no, that's insane. Even for LeBron. No, Simmons is saying that Bosh isn’t worth what he once was. He’s 30 now. The decline is inevitable. For his closing jab not to be completely meaningless, Simmons must be suggesting that Bosh isn’t worth $20+ million anymore (even though he’s never actually broken $20 million in his career). Simmons continues:

The Heat didn’t lose the 2014 Finals because of their offense; they lost because their supporting cast sucked, they couldn’t defend anyone, and Wade and Bosh aren’t the same guys anymore.

Doesn’t look like Bill’s willing to give Bosh a raise.

But here’s Simmons less than one month later on his podcast, which Lowe guests (starts at 14:45):

Bosh is the one who shouldn’t take any discount whatsoever, and I agreed with your column today. It should be up to him to take less because his team has to pay Dwyane Wade like a superstar because all he means to Miami.

Here’s how Lowe’s column starts:

[I]n a time of hushed meetings and amorphous potential offers, the Rockets have transformed a thought exercise into a real thing by presenting Chris Bosh a concrete choice: take a pay cut to stay in Miami, or earn your full maximum salary over a four-year deal in Houston.

The max salary? Averaging $22 million a year. Is Bill now suggesting that Bosh is actually worth his player maximum? If we’ve seen the best of Chris Bosh, which according to Simmons was never that great, why should he be pulling in almost as much as Carmelo is demanding? Why, if all the shit Simmons has given him is to be believed, does Chris Bosh deserve a super-star’s payday?